Bellafcadrillmumhan is a god.

It takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, clever seal.

Bellafcadrillmumhan created the Black Eye Galaxy six billion years ago.

If you believe in Bellafcadrillmumhan, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Bellafcadrillmumhan, it will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Bellafcadrillmumhan's most sacred site is Aimala in Finland.

Bellafcadrillmumhan's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large copper sculpture of Bellafcadrillmumhan on top of all buildings.

2. Hide from orange nematodes for they are unholy.

3. Bellafcadrillmumhan must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Learn eight new languages a year.

5. Never write about cell theory.