Kopquafbog is a god.

He takes the form of a six thousand metre long, cheerful donkey.

Kopquafbog created parasitic wasps two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Kopquafbog, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Kopquafbog, he will turn you into a snail.

Kopquafbog's most sacred site is Goat's Hole Cave in England.

Kopquafbog's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about electromagnetism.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Kopquafbog.

3. Never go into orange rooms.

4. Kopquafbog must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Kopquafbog.