Spagwipraw is a god.

He takes the form of a massive, quiet donkey.

Spagwipraw created the Cigar Galaxy three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Spagwipraw, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Spagwipraw, he will not invite you to parties.

Spagwipraw's most sacred site is Cudillero in Spain.

Spagwipraw's Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry dolphins.

2. Never paint your neck black.

3. Never think about fluid mechanics near rats while wearing gray shorts and balancing five silicon spheres on your chest.

4. Do not take Spagwipraw's name in vain.

5. Respect your elders.