Fedbunxemapploop is a god.

She takes the form of a chunky, unthinking skunk.

Fedbunxemapploop created a top quark nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Fedbunxemapploop, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Fedbunxemapploop, she will throw large rocks at you.

Fedbunxemapploop's most sacred site is Gorbio in France.

Fedbunxemapploop's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about dark matter near goats while wearing violet shirts and balancing six zinc spheres on your arms.

2. Never hurt doves.

3. Never laugh in holy places.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.