Yambephugqueeg is a god.

He takes the form of a two thousand metre long, all-knowing wyrm.

Yambephugqueeg created a strange quark seven million years ago.

If you believe in Yambephugqueeg, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Yambephugqueeg, he will turn you into a puffin.

Yambephugqueeg's most sacred site is Minnigaff in Scotland.

Yambephugqueeg's Holy Commandments

1. Never cross mountains at dusk.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of carbon.

3. Never carve symbols of stars into wood.

4. Never think about special relativity near birds while wearing black shirts and balancing eight silver spheres on your chest.

5. Do not stand on grass.