Hapkikwon is a god.

It takes the form of a five hundred metre long, dishonest pigeon.

Hapkikwon created the solar system eight million years ago.

If you believe in Hapkikwon, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Hapkikwon, it will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Hapkikwon's most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.

Hapkikwon's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Erect a giant silver sculpture of Hapkikwon in the centre of the settlement.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate squirrels.

4. Never look at asteroids.

5. Do not fashion models of living things.