Bemnulnill is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely heavy, merciless finch.

Bemnulnill created Europe five million years ago.

If you believe in Bemnulnill, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Bemnulnill, it will turn you into a hamster.

Bemnulnill's most sacred site is Denshawai in Egypt.

Bemnulnill's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about gravity.

2. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

3. Never wear brown shoes.

4. Paint representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place in purple.

5. Always help horses.