Hotsafgodjig is a god.

It takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, selfish donkey.

Hotsafgodjig created a top quark six billion years ago.

If you believe in Hotsafgodjig, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Hotsafgodjig, it will cry a lot.

Hotsafgodjig's most sacred site is Camon in France.

Hotsafgodjig's Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the south.

2. Do not trade with those who eat lemons.

3. Never feed aubergines to swans while wearing jumpers.

4. Paint representations of moons on the walls of your dwelling place in red.

5. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Hotsafgodjig.