Narlgambed is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly large, grumpy goat.

Narlgambed created the solar system nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Narlgambed, it will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Narlgambed, it will turn you into a tree.

Narlgambed's most sacred site is Aranganur in India.

Narlgambed's Holy Commandments

1. Whales are not to be trusted.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Erect three gold sculptures of Narlgambed on top of important buildings.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of titanium.

5. Put Narlgambed first in all things.