Sidmipwegfadgil is a god.

He takes the form of a slim, fast wolf.

Sidmipwegfadgil created humanity seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Sidmipwegfadgil, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Sidmipwegfadgil, he will boil you in a big pot.

Sidmipwegfadgil's most sacred site is Dommerby in Denmark.

Sidmipwegfadgil's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Never talk about ultrasonics near doves while wearing pink dresses and balancing four titanium spheres on your chest.

3. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

4. Hide if five swans approach from the west.

5. Do not listen to music.