Wegtadnurl is a god.

It takes the form of a three thousand metre long, moody penguin.

Wegtadnurl created a down quark five million years ago.

If you believe in Wegtadnurl, it will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Wegtadnurl, it will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Wegtadnurl's most sacred site is Ilmola in Finland.

Wegtadnurl's Holy Commandments

1. You must pray to Wegtadnurl eight times a day.

2. Wegtadnurl loves snails, so they must be honoured.

3. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

4. Never look in ponds.

5. Do not listen to music.