Femnutomin is a god.

She takes the form of an enormous, slow warg.

Femnutomin created a strange quark seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Femnutomin, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Femnutomin, she will turn you into a rat.

Femnutomin's most sacred site is Denshawai in Egypt.

Femnutomin's Holy Commandments

1. Never speak of balance in the presence of strangers.

2. Do not gather at doors at midday.

3. Erect eight lead sculptures of Femnutomin on top of important buildings.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Always make sure there are no tortoises in a building before entering it.