Stafgunwad is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely heavy, capable pigeon.

Stafgunwad created the Small Magellanic Cloud two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Stafgunwad, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Stafgunwad, she will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Stafgunwad's most sacred site is Acanceh in Mexico.

Stafgunwad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear zinc on your body.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Do not cook food in pots.

5. Nematodes are unholy and should not be approached.