Watgepladfet is a god.

It takes the form of a three hundred metre long, awe-inspiring hyena.

Watgepladfet created snails nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Watgepladfet, it will not care.

If you do not believe in Watgepladfet, it will turn you into a plant.

Watgepladfet's most sacred site is Gorbio in France.

Watgepladfet's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of moons on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Learn three new languages a year.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Never think about quantum mechanics.

5. Do not hurt monkeys.