Yatfithug is a god.

He takes the form of a chunky, clever porpoise.

Yatfithug created parasitic wasps two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Yatfithug, he will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Yatfithug, he will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Yatfithug's most sacred site is Hobeck in Germany.

Yatfithug's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least six thousand metres per day.

2. Do not covet oxen.

3. Do not eat bananas.

4. You must pray to Yatfithug five times a day.

5. Never eat carrots.