Xucdadnul is a god.

She takes the form of a planet-sized, all-powerful tapir.

Xucdadnul created the Sun eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Xucdadnul, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Xucdadnul, she will ignore you and hope you go away.

Xucdadnul's most sacred site is Daraina in Madagascar.

Xucdadnul's Holy Commandments

1. Always look after injured bats.

2. Never discuss photosynthesis in public assemblies.

3. Always make sure there are no horses in a building before entering it.

4. Never handle iron while unclean.

5. Xucdadnul loves aardvarks, so they must be respected.