Dutgadhog is a god.

She takes the form of a planet-sized, caring dingo.

Dutgadhog created vertebrates two billion years ago.

If you believe in Dutgadhog, she will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Dutgadhog, she will turn you into a rat.

Dutgadhog's most sacred site is Hongcun in China.

Dutgadhog's Holy Commandments

1. Hide from indigo dolphins for they are unholy.

2. Pray towards the east.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. Never skip in holy places.

5. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.