Godbadshav Poptafkip Futrowfun is a god.

She takes the form of a very small, tranquil bat.

Godbadshav Poptafkip Futrowfun created the Sun five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Godbadshav Poptafkip Futrowfun, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Godbadshav Poptafkip Futrowfun, she will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Godbadshav Poptafkip Futrowfun's most sacred site is Kauvatsa in Finland.

Godbadshav Poptafkip Futrowfun's Holy Commandments

1. Goats are not to be trusted.

2. Draw representations of galaxies on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Never feed bananas to dogs while wearing gray stockings.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Godbadshav Poptafkip Futrowfun.

5. Do not drink water in yellow rooms.