Neldagnanjinpanghug is a god.

He takes the form of a heavy, duplicitous squirrel.

Neldagnanjinpanghug created viruses seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Neldagnanjinpanghug, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Neldagnanjinpanghug, he will strike you with lightening.

Neldagnanjinpanghug's most sacred site is Penhale in England.

Neldagnanjinpanghug's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair violet.

2. Never write about dwarf planets.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. Never laugh in holy places.

5. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Neldagnanjinpanghug.