Cepzogcen is a god.

He takes the form of a thin, sage hippopotamus.

Cepzogcen created light two years ago.

If you believe in Cepzogcen, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Cepzogcen, he will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Cepzogcen's most sacred site is Paavola in Finland.

Cepzogcen's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about archaea.

2. Never look in ponds.

3. Swans are unholy and should not be approached.

4. Always help whales.

5. Never think about moons.