Kamgoflarglad is a god.

He takes the form of a three hundred metre long, unsympathetic camel.

Kamgoflarglad created a photon two years ago.

If you believe in Kamgoflarglad, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Kamgoflarglad, he will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Kamgoflarglad's most sacred site is Goat's Hole Cave in England.

Kamgoflarglad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Kamgoflarglad loves tapirs, so they must be respected.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. Kamgoflarglad must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Never think about quantum mechanics near geese while wearing mauve ear rings and balancing seven nickel spheres on your feet.