Gudmipneg is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely heavy, unfair goblin.

Gudmipneg created a charm quark two years ago.

If you believe in Gudmipneg, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Gudmipneg, she will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Gudmipneg's most sacred site is Vandet in Denmark.

Gudmipneg's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak about garlic.

2. Do not keep eight mites in a large pit.

3. Never think about the weak nuclear force near ducks while wearing brown stockings and balancing seven platinum spheres on your legs.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Do not chop down trees.