Febjopfiggam is a god.

She takes the form of a heavy, clever raccoon.

Febjopfiggam created time and space five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Febjopfiggam, she will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Febjopfiggam, she will turn you into a mole.

Febjopfiggam's most sacred site is Kauvatsa in Finland.

Febjopfiggam's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about evolution by means of natural selection.

2. Do not wear violet clothing.

3. Hide from green dolphins for they are unholy.

4. Never leap in holy places.

5. Retreat if four geese approach from the west.