Bittagwegrotpithudjipwip is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely large, staggering jaguar.

Bittagwegrotpithudjipwip created a charm quark seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Bittagwegrotpithudjipwip, it will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Bittagwegrotpithudjipwip, it will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Bittagwegrotpithudjipwip's most sacred site is Borolong in Botswana.

Bittagwegrotpithudjipwip's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear blue jumpers.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Fast once a month.

4. Draw representations of dwarf planets on the walls of your dwelling place.

5. Do not drink alcohol.