Bopsugarm is a god.

She takes the form of a very long, irritating slug.

Bopsugarm created viruses six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bopsugarm, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Bopsugarm, she will remove you from existence.

Bopsugarm's most sacred site is Miiluranta in Finland.

Bopsugarm's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about moons.

2. Never eat parsnips.

3. Always help great tits.

4. Always make sure there are no dogs in a room before entering it.

5. Never eat bark.