Nankemcun is a god.

She takes the form of a very long, pitiless hyena.

Nankemcun created energy seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Nankemcun, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Nankemcun, she will have a very low opinion of you.

Nankemcun's most sacred site is Gomba in Hungary.

Nankemcun's Holy Commandments

1. Learn eight new languages a year.

2. Do not cook food in pots.

3. Walk at least four thousand metres per day.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Never talk about quantum field theory near grasshopers while wearing indigo coats and balancing three gold spheres on your legs.