Flathamtar is a god.

It takes the form of a slender, unselfish cobra.

Flathamtar created the Milkyway two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Flathamtar, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Flathamtar, it will try to impress you with rainbows.

Flathamtar's most sacred site is Mmankgodi in Botswana.

Flathamtar's Holy Commandments

1. Flathamtar loves frogs, so they must be respected.

2. Flathamtar must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Never hurt squirrels.

4. Never go into purple rooms.

5. Do not hurt monkeys.