Vonkyakrapdav is a god.

It takes the form of a very small, passionate mongoose.

Vonkyakrapdav created carbon six million years ago.

If you believe in Vonkyakrapdav, it will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Vonkyakrapdav, it will send you a strongly worded letter.

Vonkyakrapdav's most sacred site is Pisterzo in Italy.

Vonkyakrapdav's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about rats.

2. Never write about thermodynamics.

3. Never eat limes.

4. Do not dye your hair green.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of titanium.