Busvonmandim is a god.

He takes the form of a planet-sized, competent porpoise.

Busvonmandim created carbon two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Busvonmandim, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Busvonmandim, he will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Busvonmandim's most sacred site is Gadna in Hungary.

Busvonmandim's Holy Commandments

1. Do not covet oxen.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Paint representations of dwarf planets on the walls of your dwelling place.

4. Never think about gravity.

5. Walk at least four thousand metres per day.