Hadcapjad is a god.

He takes the form of a massive, all-powerful beaver.

Hadcapjad created the universe nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Hadcapjad, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Hadcapjad, he will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Hadcapjad's most sacred site is Manakuppam in India.

Hadcapjad's Holy Commandments

1. Always take life seriously.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate nematodes.

3. Always wear magenta.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of aluminium.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.