Tofjamhak Bugnadqueeg is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely fat, all-powerful shrew.

Tofjamhak Bugnadqueeg created matter two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tofjamhak Bugnadqueeg, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Tofjamhak Bugnadqueeg, he will turn you into a duck.

Tofjamhak Bugnadqueeg's most sacred site is Embalam in India.

Tofjamhak Bugnadqueeg's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no swans in a building before entering it.

2. Always wear mauve.

3. Fast once a month.

4. Do not drink alcohol.

5. Do not dye your hair violet.