Saffotbop is a god.

It takes the form of a huge, irritating lobster.

Saffotbop created light four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Saffotbop, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Saffotbop, it will turn you into a mouse.

Saffotbop's most sacred site is Gorslas in Wales.

Saffotbop's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

2. Do not keep eight sharks in a large pit.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate gulls.

4. Pray towards the west.

5. Never write about special relativity.