Mapmutnat is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely large, annoying seal.

Mapmutnat created bats eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Mapmutnat, it will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Mapmutnat, it will turn you into a rock.

Mapmutnat's most sacred site is Gorbio in France.

Mapmutnat's Holy Commandments

1. Draw representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Always wear mauve.

3. Do not kill gulls.

4. Never write about dark energy.

5. Do not wear copper on your body.