Ditstigkon is a god.

She takes the form of a giant, all-powerful bear.

Ditstigkon created the Milkyway eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Ditstigkon, she will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Ditstigkon, she will turn you into a mouse.

Ditstigkon's most sacred site is Leswalt in Scotland.

Ditstigkon's Holy Commandments

1. Always stare at clouds.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of titanium.

3. Fast once a month.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Erect a giant nickel sculpture of Ditstigkon in the centre of the settlement.