Bempadstip is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely heavy, dishonourable swallow.

Bempadstip created a strange quark four billion years ago.

If you believe in Bempadstip, he will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Bempadstip, he will attempt to scare you with hail.

Bempadstip's most sacred site is Temmes in Finland.

Bempadstip's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about asteroids.

2. Never look in ponds.

3. Never talk about ultrasonics.

4. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

5. Worship no other gods but Bempadstip.