Man is a god.

She takes the form of a six thousand metre long, deceitful penguin.

Man created the Milkyway four billion years ago.

If you believe in Man, she will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Man, she will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Man's most sacred site is Snapp in Sweden.

Man's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear tin on your body.

2. Never paint your neck violet.

3. Never mention birds.

4. Never talk about fire.

5. Always treat eagles with great respect.