Vadvolhun is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely small, ruthless whale.

Vadvolhun created the planet Mars two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Vadvolhun, it will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Vadvolhun, it will try to impress you with trees.

Vadvolhun's most sacred site is Oitti in Finland.

Vadvolhun's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of tin.

2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

3. Hide from magenta monkeys for they are unholy.

4. Do not drink water in indigo rooms.

5. Paint representations of nebulae on the walls of your dwelling place.