Sigwikfod is a god.

She takes the form of an one thousand metre long, slow newt.

Sigwikfod created Europe seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Sigwikfod, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Sigwikfod, she will turn you into a sparrow.

Sigwikfod's most sacred site is Aimala in Finland.

Sigwikfod's Holy Commandments

1. Never sit in the presence of mice.

2. Do not hurt hamsters.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Sigwikfod.