Flatpadcet Dodviljarn is a god.

It takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, calm fish.

Flatpadcet Dodviljarn created the Cigar Galaxy three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Flatpadcet Dodviljarn, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Flatpadcet Dodviljarn, it will destroy your favourite planet.

Flatpadcet Dodviljarn's most sacred site is Troqueer in Scotland.

Flatpadcet Dodviljarn's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

2. Feed all hungry doves.

3. Do not speak about grapes.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Never think about galaxies.