Kenmumwat is a god.

It takes the form of a six thousand metre long, overgenerous capybara.

Kenmumwat created carbon four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Kenmumwat, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Kenmumwat, it will be very unhappy.

Kenmumwat's most sacred site is Oppin in Germany.

Kenmumwat's Holy Commandments

1. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Kenmumwat loves moths, so they must be honoured.

4. Never leap in holy places.

5. Never talk about quantum gravity near ducks while wearing white coats and balancing three silver spheres on your neck.