Canmipfat is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely small, two-faced jaguar.

Canmipfat created the world eight million years ago.

If you believe in Canmipfat, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Canmipfat, it will turn you into a duck.

Canmipfat's most sacred site is Kauvatsa in Finland.

Canmipfat's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Never talk about nebulae.

3. Put Canmipfat first in all things.

4. Erect five lead sculptures of Canmipfat on top of important buildings.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.