Rapdumtof is a god.

He takes the form of a very fat, staggering jackal.

Rapdumtof created a photon seven million years ago.

If you believe in Rapdumtof, he will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Rapdumtof, he will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Rapdumtof's most sacred site is Bokaa in Botswana.

Rapdumtof's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about black holes.

2. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

3. Never think about ultrasonics.

4. Never think about quantum mechanics near seals while wearing purple rings and balancing eight titanium spheres on your back.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.