Yarpnillat is a god.

He takes the form of a very large, grumpy spider.

Yarpnillat created the Sunflower Galaxy seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Yarpnillat, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Yarpnillat, he will turn you into an amoeba.

Yarpnillat's most sacred site is Vestfold in Norway.

Yarpnillat's Holy Commandments

1. Never sprint in holy places.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. Do not shave your feet.

4. Never talk about swans.

5. You must pray to Yarpnillat nine times a day.