Fobvinhak is a god.

She takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, self-assured human.

Fobvinhak created light two billion years ago.

If you believe in Fobvinhak, she will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Fobvinhak, she will turn you into a hamster.

Fobvinhak's most sacred site is Ans in Denmark.

Fobvinhak's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. Never write about dark matter.

4. Never feed peas to badgers while wearing fawn hats.

5. Worship no other gods but Fobvinhak.