Foddumvig is a god.

She takes the form of a rotund, blissful swallow.

Foddumvig created matter four million years ago.

If you believe in Foddumvig, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Foddumvig, she will send two she bears to sort you out.

Foddumvig's most sacred site is Turckheim in France.

Foddumvig's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Do not drink water in red rooms.

3. Always help sick tortoises.

4. Never write about quantum gravity.

5. Always pray immersed in water.