Kopsugpinsakjiglatquart is a god.

She takes the form of a small, unsympathetic troll.

Kopsugpinsakjiglatquart created everything that exists four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Kopsugpinsakjiglatquart, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Kopsugpinsakjiglatquart, she will send four elephants to rub you out.

Kopsugpinsakjiglatquart's most sacred site is Grimme in Germany.

Kopsugpinsakjiglatquart's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair white.

2. Do not make images of living things.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Never look in ponds.

5. Do not stand on grass.