Yattstipbednad is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly large, merciful swallow.

Yattstipbednad created Europe nine million years ago.

If you believe in Yattstipbednad, it will not care.

If you do not believe in Yattstipbednad, it will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Yattstipbednad's most sacred site is Glastonbury Tor in England.

Yattstipbednad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not stand on grass.

2. Always stare at clouds.

3. Never eat bark.

4. Never go into turquoise rooms.

5. Run away if nine nematodes approach from the west.