Honbegleg is a god.

It takes the form of a very long, competent seal.

Honbegleg created dark energy six billion years ago.

If you believe in Honbegleg, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Honbegleg, it will turn you into a blue tit.

Honbegleg's most sacred site is Pontelandolfo in Italy.

Honbegleg's Holy Commandments

1. Never play with disobedient children.

2. Never paint your chest cyan.

3. Never write about dark energy.

4. Rats are not to be trusted.

5. You must never eat cherries.