Xengarben is a god.

She takes the form of a huge, idiotic armadillo.

Xengarben created water seven million years ago.

If you believe in Xengarben, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Xengarben, she will make you grow a tail.

Xengarben's most sacred site is Insel in Germany.

Xengarben's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no badgers in a room before entering it.

2. Never paint your feet blue.

3. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

4. You must pray to Xengarben four times a day.

5. Fast once a month.