Quimgemquart is a god.

He takes the form of a large, able dugong.

Quimgemquart created the Whirlpool Galaxy nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Quimgemquart, he will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Quimgemquart, he will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Quimgemquart's most sacred site is Yongding in China.

Quimgemquart's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from mauve goats, for they are unholy.

2. Never think about optics.

3. Never talk about archaea.

4. Never think about the weak nuclear force near cats while wearing green tights and balancing seven carbon spheres on your back.

5. Do not listen to heathen tongues.