Bigjipkapbanjanhamfas is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, prudent raccoon.

Bigjipkapbanjanhamfas created the Large Magellanic Cloud seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Bigjipkapbanjanhamfas, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Bigjipkapbanjanhamfas, she will destroy your home solar system.

Bigjipkapbanjanhamfas' most sacred site is Evol in France.

Bigjipkapbanjanhamfas' Holy Commandments

1. Always treat dolphins with great respect.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Walk at least eight thousand metres per day.

4. Erect a giant iron sculpture of Bigjipkapbanjanhamfas in the centre of the settlement.

5. Do not hurt tortoises.